Tag Archive | relationships

Tombstone reads: Was Busy.

Not pointing fingers – what works for you, works for you. There was a time I found myself running from one invite to the next. I realized I was not enjoying any of it as I tried to be everywhere I was invited to all at once. I recently asked a friend I haven’t seen in months if she wanted to get together to catch up. I envisioned us gabbing over cocktails at a restaurant in the city like old times.

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Are you Adult-ing?

There are some things that have started to happen with my friends and I which has made us consider the possibility that we are getting finer with time. Does any of these sound familiar? If so, you may also be uhm…adulting. Continue reading

9 Seconds! Make a call – Save a Life

42767There was very little conversation being had in church about Domestic Violence. We talked about dating, marriage, tithing, stewardship and spiritual gifts. Pause –if you read the pervious 2 sentences at a normal pace, that was about 9 seconds. As I was saying…There was a ministry for everything from the church van to the community concerns (Candle Night out) but no one was talking about the black eye the Sunday School teacher often had. (9seconds). We were told ‘you are fearfully and wonderfully made’ but our young men and women weren’t reaffirmed in their self esteem in our Sunday School or Youth Group to know what that means. (9 seconds) We sang Jesus loves me, but when it came to it – did we know how that love had different meanings in each home? (9 seconds) Domestic violence comes in many forms (physical, emotional, sexual, financial, elder abuse) and over 10 years ago a 501c3  (9 seconds) organization-Preciouslyfe was formed to boldly have a faith based conversation about it. (9 seconds) Preciouslyfe (Now My Tattered Brim) continues to work, speak, encourage and pray for change, education and awareness of abuse. (9 seconds)

Be aware and have the conversations. The first National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, released on December 14, 2011, reveals the alarming magnitude of domestic violence, sexual assault, stalking and dating violence in America. In the time it took to read the first paragraph of this post- according the US Justice Department – about 7 people  were victims of domestic violence. Do the math. 7 people a minute. 60 minutes. 420 victims an hour.

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Among states, Pennsylvania tied for 15th place for women, and ranked 25th place for men, in the lifetime prevalence of rape, physical violence and/or stalking by an intimate partner. This is why we need your help.

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I’ll be My Own Number One

There are days when you wake up and have to be like David and encourage yourself. Not3d89edafa9dd80de939756405b9cb9a9
because you don’t have an awesome other half that listens to you whine, encourages and holds you up when you are feeling down and deflated. No matter how you try to shake it you see evidence of the irritation(s) everywhere you look. Each sign making the tear in the irk fabric larger and larger until its a deep, dark, empty hole. Continue reading

I Speak A New Language – porque soy más del 40!!

I work for an organization where some of my colleagues speak many languages. It is an enviable ability that has had me wish I really paid attention when Senior Fazinni was teaching my Spanish class, at least to recall more than a few phrases. The one that I still remember and used most – ¿puedo ir al baño so  I could find a study hall to socialize in. I’m ashamed but confession is good for the soul. Hola NAHS clase de 89!! Continue reading

Teachings from Miranda Priestly

Who is Miranda Priestly you ask? Who. Is. Miranda?! — First, me get this out of the way: Yeaaaahhh I know it’s been a while since I’ve updated whats been going on Under this Brim. Forgive me, I have taken on a new challenge….school. Mommy always says ‘You are never to old to learn or never to young to teach’…lies. There are differences in adult learning and the youth learning…but we’ll whip out our course notes from WhereEver University & commiserate on that subject later.

Let’s learn a thing or two from one of my fave movies….The Devil Wears Prada. This movie is about 10 years old and I can tell you that the one liners are still used today. In summary Miranda Priestly (Meryl Streep) is an icon revered in the fashion industry. Her new assistant Andrea (Ann Hathaway) has much more to learn other than what Miranda wanted for lunch…If you have not seen it go see the movie, come back and tell me I’m wrong. If you are an Miranda Priestly fan….you will want to get your snack, take notes and read on. Continue reading

Hello?

I once heard  that dreams are like grapes on a vine – if they don’t get nurtured to grow they dry up and turn into raisins. I say that is true about almost anything….relationships, careers, goals (fill-in-the-blank-with-your-word-here) and so on and so on. Continue reading

Time to be Selfish

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Yes…this is how it feels….

It was the coldest day of the year…maybe not according to the meteorologists but  it sure felt like it. The wind’s icy grip snatched tears out of my eyes. My dried lips felt like sandpaper as they pressed together tightly in an Continue reading

….if its abuse….why do they stay??!

Leaving shadowIf it’s abuse…..why do they stay?? IF it is…..

How many times have you heard this question??  I’ve heard people say, “that’s a shame….why do/did you stay in an abusive relationship?” or “Why doesn’t she just leave?”  Sometimes the question is meant as an honest inquiry.  However, often it is spoken with an undercurrent of hostility or disbelief that things must not be as bad as they seem. This attitude sends a  message to anyone who stays in abusive relationships are somehow to blame for their abuse. Continue reading